Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Commencement 2008

Please Go Suck Someplace Else!

Let me tell you how it feels when all your friends are attending convocation/commencement and you are not. 

It really sucks. 

Imagine being jilted by the hot girl who went out for a steamy date with every guy friend you have, but stop short of hanging out with you. 

Imagine happily queuing up for Baskin Robbin's free ice cream and have the shutter of the stall come crashing down at your face. At a loss of what to do, you turn back to give that helpless shrug to the person behind you in the queue. 

There's no one there. 

Imagine you are queuing up to enter Noah's Ark, but Noah told you that God didn't invite you. While walking down the primitive staircase, stepping on manures everywhere, you vaguely hear sound of crashing waves approaching. 

Imagine all of your family went out for an overseas holiday, and they were so engrossed about the whole thing that they forgot about you completely at departure, leaving you staying alone at home while they were having a blast at some exotic places. 

Imagine, that you are this guy. 

Ok that's how i am feeling now while everyone is attending the commencement now. They must be queuing up to enter the august hall and get their hold on the scrolls now. 

Probably they are listening to the valedictorian speech now. About how great the educational experience is. 

I guess some of you start to pity me at this point of time. 

But think twice. 

A hot girl who goes out for a steamy date with every one of your guy friends probably is called a hooker. And your friends? Bald retirees with a beer belly, and grease from dinner's steak smearing the lips. 

Baskin Robbin ice cream? Ok i don't fancy it too much. I don't need more atheroma clogging my arteries, now that i already have significant cardiovascular risk factor. 

God-forsaken and looking at the leaving Ark? Ok i am a Buddhist so i am kinda prepared for it. Till my next life... But before that i will frantically finish reading my 'God is Not Great' while nodding frantically. 

And gotten left behind by family? 


I will blow up the house like him*! 
*I really hate to see what a jackass he grows up to be

Not too bad huh. 

I am going to shower then will go meet all my friends after the ceremony. 

Hmm whose gown should i grab to take my pseudo-graduation photos? 

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